Just a few minutes ago I was sitting and meditating and it occurred to me: I can meditate again.
I used to meditate every night before bed many years ago. I had an altar set up and each night I would light candles and incense, put on some quiet contemplative music – some of which I’d written myself – and I would meditate for a half hour to an hour before going to sleep. That stopped when I got married. Wendy – my ex-wife – was and is a very slovenly person who also has no sense of personal boundaries and she would constantly set down her trash everywhere, including on my altar. After we got together I found that I no longer had any clean place to sit, her personal items, like her purse, would end up on my altar knocking other things over, and she would walk around making noise while I tried to meditate, so in short order I just had to give up meditation altogether and take down the altar. I resented it, but there was simply no way to continue my practice while with her. I tried to accept this as just part of being married.
But now I am no longer constrained, and without really thinking too much about it I had set aside a little place in my RV for a candle and an incense burner to provide a little cheer. Then last night I was feeling very restless and decided to try meditating to help me relax and get to sleep. It worked very well and I had one of the best night’s sleep I’ve had in a long time. So tonight I decided to do it again, and as I sat there I suddenly realized that I actually can meditate again because Wendy is no longer around to interfere. As much as I hated the divorce, this is a pleasant benefit of it.